Richmond Muddy Buddy 2009 Experience

This weekend I competed in a Muddy Buddy race. When it was over I was dirty, sweaty, wet, and happy to have experienced the event.

I left MoCo around 11 AM and made our way to an area south of Richmond in Chesterfield, VA. It's a land of Civil War sites, a NASCAR race track, and no synagogues. After grabbing race packets and buying the cheapest sportswear Target had to offer, I stopped at the aptly-named American Diner. Oddly enough or aptly expected, it closes at 3 everyday and doesn't have a website.

Good service...just not the place a kid with a Terrapins shirt should feel comfortable. Ignorant B and T Crowd stereotyping commence!

It's a place where locals congregate to get away from the franchises up and down the Midlothion Turnpike. With TVs permanently set to the Fox News Channel (I kid you not) and tobacco tchotchkes abound (it is VA's top crop), my University of Maryland t-shirt wasn't the smartest dress choice. We played it safe and ordered some burgers and fries. The burgers were average, but the fries were spectacular. I don't even think the kitchen staff spit on them!

We were only 2.5 hours away, but far from home.

As for a Muddy Buddy race...it's 6-7 miles of biking and running with 4 obstacles (in our case, but it's usually 5) throughout the race. Partnered teams switch between biking and running at each obstacle until the joint mud pit bath at the end. Sounds enticing right? There weren't many costumes for our race, in fact, only the He-Man/Skeletor team was worth mentioning.

When I yell, "on your left!" don't make me ride off the path to pass when you're supposed to move to the right.

The first wave was sent at 7 while we waited for our turn that wouldn't come for 30 minutes. In the interlude we were entertained with dance beats at least 10 years ago, also known as my half of our MP3 collection, with classics such as "I'm Blue," "Heaven," and "Scatman." I was instantly transported to my underclassman years at any dirty bar in Adams Morgan that moved its tables away for people to dance at night.

With the airhorn blast, the front of our wave rode off as the runners followed 90 seconds later.  I got caught in the back of my wave's runners, but slowly, methodically, and luckily plucked off runners in front and reached the first obstacle - a 10-foot climbing wall with a cargo net on the other side.

Please enjoy the only Muddy Buddy video that's not annoying, even if it is last year's Orlando race.

I have a history of not doing well on climbing walls because I try to "arm" my way up instead of using my legs. Well that, and I'm not flexible and listen to my fears too often. Thanks to a muddy trail from tons of rain the night before, my non-trail running shoes from last year didn't grip so well, but I managed to clear the wall. Not bad after the 1.5-mile run. I grabbed the bike and was on my way.

Riding a woman's hybrid on a low seat felt like a tricycle. I thought my weight would crush the frame. I couldn't extend my legs much beyond 90 degrees so it was a lot of stand-up pedal pumping until the 2nd obstacle, a balance beam. One request for organizers, how about spacing the beams farther apart so when people fall they have room to fall?

I trudged through without stopping for the 1.5 miles and knocked out the 3rd obstacle - a military crawl under netting. I grabbed the bike left at the transition area and sucked down water knowing I was over halfway done.

I asked if I could help those with broken bike chains, but I had no idea how to fix them and was just offering rhetorical morale support.

I rode to the 4th and final obstacle - a 25-foot cargo net climb to a slide on the other side. I think it would help if one lower rung of cargo net was available to help shorter competitors get started. I walked to the water station and downed 3 cups before starting my final leg on foot...ba-dum-bum-bum. Another request to water station fillers, don't put your empty cups on the first table we approach, it's a cruel joke to make us search for water.

Always a good way to breakup a long run and bike ride.

I didn't exactly set a world record on this leg. My legs weren't underneath me at all. The final trail section was very muddy so I was sliding all over and wasn't getting much response from each push. Then I reached a small, but dirty lake to wade through. This soaked my bottom half, but somehow I kept my smile throughout, telling everyone in earshot to think of it as clear as the water of St. Lucia. About a mile remained so I was optimistic until I tried running again. My shoes were soaked (duh!) so it felt like I was running with 3-pound ankle weights the rest of the way.

Don't dive in (it's one foot deep) and don't put your face in the mud.

My advice: Bring towels like we did to not only clean off and protect your car seat, but also to give you privacy while changing in the back seat. And a garbage bag to throw your clothes away.

I ran to the mud pit and began my crawl when my shins felt on fire. Turns out the mud pit had gravel rocks at the bottom. Make this request #4 of an otherwise great event, make future mud pits free of rocks. I'm enjoying some busted up shin scrapes this minute thanks to the less than smooth bottom. I ran to the finish line, posed for pictures, and washed down. Relieved to have finished without major injury and happier for the experience.

As soon as you washed the mud off it magically appeared again.

I won't be doing this race again because a lot of the fun is its singular novelty, but would surely recommend it to everyone. It's a lot of fun and if a big oaf like myself can get through, so can you.